The “bloggy” Side Of Me

My bloggy friend Kim from “My Inner Chick” posed a question on her latest blog post “Blog Power”: What is the reason you blog?

And she’s right. Most of us are baring our souls out there. We dig deep. Some people are better at expressing themselves than others. But that doesn’t mean you can’t blog. There’s no such thing as “not being able to blog”. As far as I’m concerned, EVERYONE knows how to blog. We all just have different styles and different subject matter. And there’s nothing wrong with that.

I visited a friend this weekend. She’s my closest friend, well one of my closest friends. She’s known me for over 20 years and she “knows” me. She can read me like a book. And I can talk to her about ANY-THING. We’ve cried together, laughed our asses off together, discovered things together and can be in the same room and know exactly what the other is thinking.

She’s not computer savvy. She does use one at work but all she really does on it is email and maybe a memo in a Word program. She has NO desire to do anything else. It’s just not her thing. And I’m cool with that.

While I was at her house sipping wine this past weekend her husband got out his laptop and after he was done using it, handed it to me. I decided to show her my blog. After explaining to her what a blog was, I read a couple of my posts to her (I had my reading glasses on, she couldn’t find hers at the moment). After about the third one, she says “I don’t know Irene, you really need to get out more.” And she was dead serious.

I was sort of taken aback by that. I asked her “What do you mean?”. She said “This doesn’t sound like you. The things your saying or writing about. Like, you really have too much time on your hands.” She was finding out something new about me. A side she never saw.

Now I didn’t take offense. A little shocked, but not offended. Wow, this is a totally different perspective. So I thought a minute, why do I do this?

Because it keeps my sanity. I’m here in this house, in this god forbidden suck hole of a town where the white trash thinks they rule. I have a lot bottled up in my brain. Spewing it on a screen makes me feel better. If no one reads it, that’s fine. I got it out. I guess living here for 9+  years has rotted my brain. I mean if you REALLY want to know how I feel, let me know. I may lose 20 subscribers but you’ll get where I’m coming from.

Ok, granted my friend isn’t computer friendly. She may not “get it”. And that’s ok. It’s not her thing. She deals with some tough love and reality checks on a daily basis in her job. High emotions and some nasty ass drunks pass through her doors. Her clients have seen the bottom of the barrel and she has watched them crawl to the top.  I can understand why she would find this to be senseless ranting.

The blogsphere is a brotherhood. We all do it for one reason or another. To tell a story, get our life out there, express our inner souls. There is no wrong or right about it. And I really find it sort of discriminating of WordPress to have certain bloggers “Freshly Pressed” because they met the “criteria”. Are you kidding me? Criteria? Because we didn’t use a prepositional phrase  properly? Didn’t diagram a sentence correctly? Our subject matter wasn’t “interesting” or “humorous” enough?  Honestly, and it’s just my opinion, some of those “Freshly Pressed”  aren’t even that interesting.

This all made me look at myself. For a moment I lost a little dignity and self esteem. It made me wonder “Is this what others think?”. I got over it. This was just her opinion. She just experienced a part of me she never knew. I have this “bloggy” side of me. I’m not looking to be an aspiring writer. I know my writing isn’t to par. Some have it naturally, others like me need honing and guidance.  It’s there, it’s just in rough form.

Yes, I will agree…I do need to get out more.

Ma Bell

Image courtesy of Plinky

Remember when you were younger, like 9 or 10? And the phone would ring and you’d go running only to have mom or dad get to the phone first? And then you would be jumping up and down in front of your mom or dad, waiting for clues from the conversation as to who it might be on the other end of the line. And they would be talking, and you would standing there and now annoying your parent by asking “Who is it, who is it?. And then mom or dad would be exasperated with your nagging and finally yell at you “HOLD ON……it’s Auntie Mable!! Now stop bothering me, I’M ON THE PHONE!”. My kids were only allowed to bother me when I was on the phone if one was bleeding profusely or dieing.

(I told my kids after this very popular utterance was made when they get older and are on the phone…..payback is going to be an inevitable bitch!)

Then when your in your teens, the phone rings (this is all before mobile phones) you go running and at this point your parents are ignoring it while dad reads his paper and mom is doing dinner. You would get all excited because 9 times out of 10 it’s for you anyway and you would sit and gab for what seemed like hours (ok, for some of us girls it probably was!). Any siblings would be telling yelling at you to get off the phone!!!. Then you got your own cell phone! For the older generation here, that wasn’t the case.

Then you became a rent and tax paying responsible adult living on your own (I debate that word “responsible” at the age of 22). Oh, the freedoms of having the phone now (for you younger generation X’s cells were now more popular). And you eagerly and happily walked over and answered because it HAD to be for you! Go ahead person on the other end, talk to me. I can handle anything! Yes, we’re big people now! Again, 9 times out of 10 it was a friend notifying you of an impending party.

As we get older, the novelty wears off. The parties become less frequent. The phone calls become appointment reminders or mom and dad or the occasional friend or relative. Or for some, collection agencies. Oh, yes, and the inevitable telemarketer.

These days I dread answering the phone. Not so much my cell because it has caller id. Luckily, I don’t get many phone calls. With each kid having a cell phone, our landline hardly rings. BUT……when it does, it’s like “now what?”. If my husband and I are in the same room, we give eachother that silent “you wanna get it or should I?” look. Meanwhile, the phone is ringing off the hook. We quickly make an assessment of where each boy is. If they’re both home, we let the machine get it. If one is out, well, one has to answer it because it may just well be Officer Obie calling to tell us one of our kin has either A) been arrested for some minor infraction that will cost us about $1000 B) one of them is calling MOMSTAR C) one is calling to let us know he was just ticketed by Officer Obie because he and his friend were hanging out in front of the 7-11 too long or D) a trip to the hospital is needed.

If my husband and I are in separate rooms, the assessment is made and then the shouting starts: “You wanna get it?”. Response from me upstairs: “No, not really.” By that time the answering machine has gotten it. I don’t have Caller ID on the landline. If the phone rings immediately after again, then we know it’s one of the kids or a relative. Then there’s a scramble to answer it and both of us are now on the line. It’s a stupid system, but it works.

I think when I move to England, I won’t have a phone. Email me. I’ll get it eventually.

Life Lessons

Cats aren't that bright

Everyone says “You learn something new everyday” and you usually do. Yesterday I learned something new but I don’t for the life of me remember what it was.

But here are a couple of things I do remember learning. Some just stay with you longer than others.

1) Your past will come back and haunt you. Facebook is proof of this.

2) Don’t go to a college that’s more than two hours away from home, leaving a boyfriend behind. Damn those cute British guys. They get me every time! Needless to say, the boyfriend and I ended on a sour note.

3) If attending said college that is two hours away, go for a purpose. Have a major. Liberal Arts is not a major. Attending the 13th grade that far from home is a waste of money and causes drunkenness and irrational activities on campus.

4) The grass isn’t always greener on the other side of the state border.

5) Make sure your foot is bigger than your mouth. This way you won’t be able to insert it when you screw up talking to your friend about another friend who’s standing right behind you.

6) Measure before you buy. Not all cars are Transformers. Just because your car can haul 7 passengers doesn’t mean it can turn into a 26′ foot U-Haul truck.

7) Commercials are misleading. When you see a commercial for a Ford F150 hauling a nuclear missile silo going over Mt. Everest on a rocky road, believe me, it’s all done on a set. Pick up trucks aren’t that stable (or that powerful).

8 ) Blow dry your hair BEFORE putting on your earrings. Unless you deliberately wanted that permanent butterfly burn mark on your neck. You could always just tell people it’s a new fad in tattooing.

9) Don’t own more cars than the number of drivers in your household. People will mistaken you for a used car lot (or worse, a service station).

10) Tomato soup and beer don’t mix.

11) Extension cords and eyes don’t mix either.

12) Raking leaves in the wind is totally useless. Unless you need the exercise. And like redundancy.

13) One way to find out how much stuff you own is to buy a house smaller than the one you just sold.

14) If something really smells bad, don’t say to me “EWW smell this!”. I’ll take your word for it. I know misery loves company, but not in this case.

15) In-ground swimming pools make great toad and frog breeding ponds.

16) I wanted to be famous, I should have had a ton of kids, called TLC, berated my husband on national tv, got divorced and then the nation would have loved me.

17) Be. Sure. To. Drink. Your. Ovaltine. I don’t know, I just felt like saying that.

18) If you want the bathroom redone, you have to do start doing it yourself. This is a hint for your husband. Once he sees what you’re TRYING to do, he’ll IMMEDIATELY step in and take over.

19) Snow Throwers are just that, for THROWING SNOW. Now where does it say on the labels that it’s a SLUSH THROWER!

20) It doesn’t make a difference if you vote or not for President. The Electoral College is the one that makes the final decision. I was very disappointed with that reality.

21) Jello sets up faster in the freezer. Makes for great slushie jello.

22) Cats just don’t care.

23) No matter what you’re watching on television, you’re always in for at least 5 minutes of commercials.

24) Universal remote controls are impossible to learn.

25) I don’t know anyone who owns a Snuggie (but I have a feeling I’m about to). Or a Slap Chop.

26) Mamby Pamby Land has me intrigued.

A Toast – To Friends

I find it heartening reading all these blogs over the Christmas holiday.

Starting with Thanksgiving and everyone I subscribe to blogging about their ideas, adventures (Black Friday, Christmas shopping), getting the tree (love the “we used to get a Home Depot tree”-how many blogs did I read with that sentiment and then finding the ultimate one even if it spins!?), shopping incidents, sending cards (I thank those who shared their addy with me!), decorating the tree, making and baking cookies, how the kids were or were not driving them crazy, and all the way up to the day after Christmas is really very cool.

I’ve found it so interesting to see how everyone manages and handles the holiday. And I’m thankful to say that everyone has a sense of humor about it. Even the little mishaps of children losing their cookies (no, not misplacing them…) or getting outraged that there are no more toys to open under the tree (they’ll get it some day). NO ONE got their tighty whities in a bind or slugged any sidewalk Santas or crammed any bells down Salvation Army volunteers throats. And a big plus for all of you – no one got arrested. HIGH FIVE GUYS!!!

Everyone’s traditions were shared with total strangers here. Thoughts, emotions, insights were on public display. And it shows how proud you all are of your families! I felt so fortunate to have read about them. Sharing cards and email (((HUGS))). It really has been quite a special Christmas. We all learned a little bit about each other emotionally here. I find that touching. And I thank all of your for allowing myself and everyone a glimpse into your family and home for the holidays.

Here’s to the New Year!