Ode to Jaffa Cakes

How much do I love Jaffa Cakes?  Let me count the ways!  Jaffa Cakes are a United Kingdom and Ireland snack that were introduced in 1927 by McVitie and Price and were named after the jaffa oranges native to Jaffa, which is some super ancient port.(thank you Wiki).

Mine are made by Jacobs via Wegmans.

Now that we got that tid bit of boring info out of the way….

These little nuggets of round sponge cake like cookie goodness with a dollop of orange jelly type sweetness on top and covered with dark chocolate coating.

You can’t eat just one.

No. You. Can’t.

Or can you eat just two? You have to eat the entire box.  Like my son and I did while I was shooting these pictures.

Oink oink!

Is it a cake or a cookie? Biscuit?

They’re so light, you have the false insecurity that will have you thinking “I can eat a couple, they can’t be THAT fattening!”

They are.

And you don’t dare share because there won’t be any left for you. Fights will break out and wars will begin over Jaffa Cakes. Don’t even attempt to ask me if you can have one. I usually hide my box because things disappear in this house with two grown boys. Nothing is sacred. Nothing is safe.

Get your own box.

I can only find them in my local Wegmans grocery store in the British import isle. Along with the “Treacle” and “Spotted Dick”.

Go ahead and laugh.

And Heinz Baked Beans. And Robinson’s Barley Water.

You know how people moan over bacon? With a cup of tea and a box of these little delights, I make the same sound.

There are many videos on YouTube about people eating as many Jaffa Cakes as they can in one minute. Some claim the record is 12. But that’s not the proper way to eat them! What a waste! You have to savior them! Take a bite and enjoy the orange and chocolate flavors. The sponge cake is just for the ride.

These are probably what is keeping England afloat in their economy.

There’s also a Jaffa Muffin! A JAFFA MUFFIN! OMG! But that’s not sold here in the US. Brits get ALL the fun!

McVitie makes Jaffa Mini Rolls that look like Yodels, there’s Jaffa Cake Bars, Jaffa Mini Cakes, Jaffa Snack Packs and Jaffas that come in 12, 24, or 36 pack. Even in a tubular container!

Mine only come in a 10 pack. These aren’t McVities but they’re close enough!

Here Comes The Royal Bride

I was asked by a couple of my good bloggy friends about doing a blog rant post about the Royal Wedding.

Everyone knows what a British nutcase I am. But I’m sort of on the fence with all this. I wasn’t sure I was going to do a blog post on Wills and Catherine. It is a great distraction from all the BS that is going on in both countries as far as the economy and foreign affairs are concerned.

The whole Royal Monarchy is a farce really. A major drain on the Briton’s wallets. The Queen and her dysfunctional brood collect a handsome allowance from the English Parliament that is about as broke as America. They have taxes on just about EVERYTHING. Don’t bother going over there during the winter. If it snows, forget it. They don’t plow the secondary roads-at all! Driving around London? Don’t forget to pay your “congestion charge”.

As I watched the BBC’s week long coverage of this wedding, you can’t help think the amount of money being dumped spent on this extravaganza. This event is bigger than the President’s inauguration. It is exciting. But I really feel the pressure for Catherine. The one correspondent remarked that 180 countries were tuned in. Could you imagine having your wedding day broadcasted around the world??? I almost got sick with the thought of under 100 PEOPLE for mine. Then on top of it all, a ROYAL wedding. You have an etiquette to adhere to as well. You’re not just walking down an isle, meeting your groom at the alter, standing there, maybe have your communion, say your vows, turn, and leave.  There’s a whole choreographed routine. The stress. But it’s so worth it. Imagine the privileges! No, I’m not going to list them, you can imagine them yourself. It isn’t hard. Just imagine your life but with everything YOU DON’T HAVE AND WISHED YOU HAD!  Other than the life threatening diseases.

And of course, we’re all thinking about the wedding night, aren’t we? I said AREN’T WE PEOPLE???? Well, Marina is.

Shit, they even got a congratulations from the Space Station.  I don’t even think Obama got that. I know for sure there wasn’t half the country camped out in front of the White House. There WAS half a country camped outside Buckingham Palace. Some for 5 days!

But I think these two are the perfect couple. SO perfect it’s sickening. Both are university educated, there’s no controversial backgrounds. You know what I mean, neither was caught in the Pink Rhino either pole dancing or having a lap dance. Neither smokes (no bongs have been spotted), she’s pretty, he’s handsome. *GAG*

After seeing Catherine’s dress, I’m excited to say it was very similar to mine! Without the mile long train and window sheer head dress. I want to know how much her earrings cost?

Image courtesy of The Week

I have to say the Queen through all this looked less than enthused. While singing one of the hymns she looked bothered, hardly singing, Camilla as well. This must be all so ho hum for them. Just another day in church. When the singing was over, the minister or whoever he was in the draperies was drolling on about something and I thought Catherine was going to yawn at one point.

I couldn’t help wonder what was going through Monkey Ears head when “to be faithful” was said.

Does anyone know why there aren’t any females in the church choir?

I tuned my brain out when all the bible reading starting taking place and went in search of my wedding album to find a decent picture of my wedding dress.

All in all it was a beautiful wedding. I didn’t get up at 3am to watch. I got up a 6:30am to tend to my garage sale. I watched highlights after dinner.

Was it worth all the build up? The months and months of coverage? The BBC taking my favorite show off the air to present the history of the Royals? ALL FRACKIN’ WEEK?

No. And Elton John looks terrible.

And the BBC can put Top Gear back on.

Ain't we sweet? Mr. and Mrs. Dork. It was so windy that day!

If  you want to read a really entertaining blog post on all this read The Good Greatsby

10 Things That Make Me Happy

I’ve been tagged by IYAMPAM (I Forgot What I Was Doing) for 10 Things That Make Me Happy. Wow, there are lots of things. I usually blog about what DOESN’T make me happy, but it’s a nice change to think happy thoughts!

I’ll start with #10 and work my way up to the most wonderful thing that make me happy. I already know what it is and I can rest assure it is a person and they really could give a flying  fuck but too bad!

10A) People who read and comment on my blogs. It’s always appreciated.

10) CHOCOLATE. This could very well rank up there with no. 1, but it’ll sit here for now. You can dip anything, except brussel sprouts, in chocolate and it always tastes better!

9) My friends Barbara and Mary Ellen and Dee and Janet. They’ve been with me through thick and thin.

8) Laughing. A good hard belly laugh, that causes you to cry because you’re laughing so hard!

7) Being on the computer. This is my social life during the day. All my friends either work or live in distant lands. So when I’m on the computer, I’m happy.

6) The thought of going to England. I WILL get there before I’m 55.

5) Music. I love music. Classical, piano, rock, new age, prog, even some heavy metal. Ok, hip hop and rap make me feel agitated. I can talk to my kids and get the same effect.

4) Cars. I LOVE CARS. Especially vintage cars. There’s just something about them. They stir the soul. Since growing up in the era of the muscle car, I have a true appreciation for them. Mustangs, Corvettes, “Cuda’s, Cougars, Thunderbirds, Camaros, Firebirds…..they all rock!

3) My husband. Ok, he’s not the no. 1 thing that makes me happy. But he comes close. Don’t tell him that, he’ll get all butt hurt.

2) Sailing. If I lived on a lake or near the ocean…I’d be in the boat half the day. Even if there’s no wind, it’s just complete satisfaction just to sit in the cockpit and hang out.

1) (Drum roll please………………..) Jeremy Clarkson. Yes, Mr. England himself. I’m not going to go into why I love this man so much, but I just do. It’s deeper than anyone could understand. So there!

If you’ve noticed, my kids aren’t on this list. Right now, they’re pissing me off. Ask me this question in about 5 years. Maybe they’ll be on it then.